I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
