So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
