Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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