? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
