At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
