marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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