The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
