apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Randomize
