the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize