Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Drunk is not a location!
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
