You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
