That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Randomize
