Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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