Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
