My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
