so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
