It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
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