I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Randomize
