I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
