the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
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