just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Randomize
