I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
OPIZZABONMYDICK
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
