I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize