there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
