if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize