I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
