Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
