$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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