Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
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