When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
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