Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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