I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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