I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
