Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
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