Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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