what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
