All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
