i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
