i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
