I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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