Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
