She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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