Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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