He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
