Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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