They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
