Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
