Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
