i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
