Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
